So I try not to complain about my life on this blog, because really I'm blessed beyond measure. I debated venting on here but I think it's good to sometimes share frustrations just so everyone knows that other people are human too. So don't feel obligated to read my gripe session. It's just time to vent.
So frustration came to the boiling over point at OT today. Maddy always does great and her therapist is great, but today she comes out and tells me that Maddy's hands aren't doing as good as they have been and that her hips are tight. We were doing great on hip stretching this summer when we had the pool. Maddy loved leaning over the side of the pool to try and grab the grass and while she was working on that I'd stretch her hips. Now it is too cold, there is no pool, and Maddy can now run away from me when she doesn't want to do something so how am I supposed to incorporate hip stretching back into the routine? Also her hands have gotten a bit tighter because Scottish Rite will not give us hand splints!!! Won't go into that gripe for now. That is a huge rabbit trail. Anyway we get them from therapy but they only have one lady that does them. Maddy was scheduled to get hand splints made back in September but we had to cancel because we had to go to Farwell for Papa's funeral. They hand splint lady is so book up that set us back 2 months on getting splints. She's scheduled to go in a get them next Thursday. Finally! On top of all this I have somehow every day got to get her to try to put weight on her left hip in sitting and kneeling positions, work on her crawling, stretch her hands and neck, stretch knees, get her in the stander, PLUS do all the normal things like naps, meals, bathing, PLUS work on writing papers for school, read for school, busy work for school, PLUS house hold chores--laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc., PLUS find time to make my husband feel like I realize he's still around. Obviously I don't get all this done everyday.
The worst part that has been bugging me lately is how do I fit God into all this. Yes I pray all the time. That is for sure. But how do I find time to sit down with my Bible and read that or do anything deeper than just pray for God to help me to get through the day. I don't think I have an excuse for not doing this, I just find it hard to work everything in. I'm find myself doing the minimum on the above mentioned daily activities as well. I try to tell myself to let it go (I mean all the stuff and if it gets done it does and if it doesn't it doesn't) but in a way that feels like telling myself it is okay to do a bad job.
Well anyway, I'm sure there are tons of moms out there who feel overwhelmed with all that's on their plates as well. Sometimes I feel like I should just give up the MA and the teaching and the extra money that would bring and try to devote more time to getting Maddy's exercises, etc. accomplished, but I also find myself thinking that God wouldn't give me a brain if he didn't want me to use it, the opportunity if he didn't want me to have it, and I'd just go plain crazy if I didn't have the chance to do something that required me to use the skills I have that can't really be used as a wife and mother alone.
It's hard to humble myself to ask for prayers, because I don't want to admit that I'm weak. But I do need some extra prayers today. So if you made it through my petty whining this far, thanks for listening. Thanks for letting me vent.
So frustration came to the boiling over point at OT today. Maddy always does great and her therapist is great, but today she comes out and tells me that Maddy's hands aren't doing as good as they have been and that her hips are tight. We were doing great on hip stretching this summer when we had the pool. Maddy loved leaning over the side of the pool to try and grab the grass and while she was working on that I'd stretch her hips. Now it is too cold, there is no pool, and Maddy can now run away from me when she doesn't want to do something so how am I supposed to incorporate hip stretching back into the routine? Also her hands have gotten a bit tighter because Scottish Rite will not give us hand splints!!! Won't go into that gripe for now. That is a huge rabbit trail. Anyway we get them from therapy but they only have one lady that does them. Maddy was scheduled to get hand splints made back in September but we had to cancel because we had to go to Farwell for Papa's funeral. They hand splint lady is so book up that set us back 2 months on getting splints. She's scheduled to go in a get them next Thursday. Finally! On top of all this I have somehow every day got to get her to try to put weight on her left hip in sitting and kneeling positions, work on her crawling, stretch her hands and neck, stretch knees, get her in the stander, PLUS do all the normal things like naps, meals, bathing, PLUS work on writing papers for school, read for school, busy work for school, PLUS house hold chores--laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc., PLUS find time to make my husband feel like I realize he's still around. Obviously I don't get all this done everyday.
The worst part that has been bugging me lately is how do I fit God into all this. Yes I pray all the time. That is for sure. But how do I find time to sit down with my Bible and read that or do anything deeper than just pray for God to help me to get through the day. I don't think I have an excuse for not doing this, I just find it hard to work everything in. I'm find myself doing the minimum on the above mentioned daily activities as well. I try to tell myself to let it go (I mean all the stuff and if it gets done it does and if it doesn't it doesn't) but in a way that feels like telling myself it is okay to do a bad job.
Well anyway, I'm sure there are tons of moms out there who feel overwhelmed with all that's on their plates as well. Sometimes I feel like I should just give up the MA and the teaching and the extra money that would bring and try to devote more time to getting Maddy's exercises, etc. accomplished, but I also find myself thinking that God wouldn't give me a brain if he didn't want me to use it, the opportunity if he didn't want me to have it, and I'd just go plain crazy if I didn't have the chance to do something that required me to use the skills I have that can't really be used as a wife and mother alone.
It's hard to humble myself to ask for prayers, because I don't want to admit that I'm weak. But I do need some extra prayers today. So if you made it through my petty whining this far, thanks for listening. Thanks for letting me vent.
Comments
Julie F
If you apply the idea of seasons to what you've just described - "this too shall pass". Doesn't make things feel better neccessarily, but I think it's true. :) I'll be praying that you'll get some much needed rest in the middle of all the craziness going on!
Brittany